supernatural

A short story I submitted for my second workshop (1750 word limit). A supernatural short story aimed at young adults. This was also a bad short story (I made the same mistake as my previous short story; pointless build up, questions left unanswered, interest in what happens afterwards if there is an after wards (which there is)) I thought the word limit was 1500 words so I cut out the introduction (which clarified who was speaking etc.) and the MC's grandparents' lines and personalities were a little too weak. Also explanations should have been in exposition, not dialogue. My writing style has pretty much remained the same since my last short story with focalization changed from first-person to (attempted) third-person subjective. I've also aimed for realism again (dialogue, personality, reactions etc.) I'm currently rewriting the story (into something completely different) for my final Uni assignment, with most of my focus on what happened after the ending of this piece.